Daily Express - Breaking news, sport and showbiz from the World's Greatest Newspaper
Newspaper Cover Page
Our Paper

Front and Back Pages, E-Edition and Back Issues...

Weather
 -1°C
London
Thursday 8th January 2009 Make us your HOME PAGE  What is RSS?

BANKERS HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE

Story Image


Like Dorothy we've discovered the magic wasn't real

Saturday October 4,2008

By Richard and Judy

RICHARD SAYS...I have written three articles this week about the banking crisis and have had to scrap each one as the situation contorts into new shapes on almost an hourly basis.

The only certainty to emerge from the fog of panic is that nobody has a clue what is going on or what will happen next.

Indeed, I am struck by how little bankers really know about the way their world works. It is as if we have been watching a conjuring act all our lives, believing it to be real.

Then, like the Wizard of Oz being revealed behind his drawn curtain, we see the smoke and mirrors and bogus machinery for what it is – a ramshackle, knocked-up illusion. Worse, the wizard forgot how it all works long ago and, now it’s all going wrong, has no idea how to fix it.

It emerged a couple of days ago that some investors are transferring savings to Ireland, where the government has promised to protect all deposits, whatever happens.

STAR QUALITY: Paul Newman

Sounds like a smart move, until you read that should meltdown really occur, the sums involved are more than three times Ireland’s output. They couldn’t possibly cover the losses.

Even the old tried and trusted keep-it-under-the-bed routine isn’t any good. What if sterling collapses? All you’ll be sleeping on is a pile of paper.

I suppose we’ll muddle through with a series of grand gestures, empty promises and good old fashioned fudge but “never glad confident morning again”, eh?

We’ve been led to a dizzying precipice by an international bunch of economic half-wits, fools and knaves. If it didn’t involve cutting off our noses to spite our faces, we should push the lot of them over the edge.

JUDY SAYS...IT WAS A REAL HONOUR TO MEET NEWMAN

With news of the sad death of Paul Newman, our thoughts turned to the unforgettable day that we met him.
He had flown to London to publicise the fact that his range of salad dressings was featuring on the menu at McDonald’s (profits going, as always, to Newman’s children’s charities).

The interview took place in the basement of McDonald’s flagship Oxford Street outlet. Richard and I arrived early and fidgeted nervously while we waited for the living legend.

SEARCH COLUMNISTS for:

Newman was famed for his punctuality (unlike many stars) and sure enough on the stroke of midday, as arranged, he materialised.

One of the most recognisable faces on the planet smiled at us, those extraordinary blue eyes twinkling under slightly hooded lids. His hand, outstretched in greeting, had a surprisingly firm grip for a man of nearly 80.

“Hi guys,” said Newman. “I should warn you – I’m not too hot at this interview thing. Never was, either.”

The illness that would claim him had yet to materialise and he looked extraordinary for a man of his age. The skin was still taut over those sculpted cheekbones, the eyes were undimmed. Not all movie heart-throbs carry their burnished looks with them when they are off a film set. Newman shone with the authentic mega-wattage of a born star.

He sat down in front of a tableau of himself in his most iconic roles – Butch Cassidy, Hud, Cool Hand Luke – and the cameras rolled.

He gave laconic, friendly answers to our questions but, not surprisingly for a man his age, occasionally his memory let him down and he would tail off before shaking his head, laughing, and saying: “See? I told you I’m lousy at this. Good job we’re taping it, huh? You can cut out all this dopey stuff later.”

We chatted for about half an hour and then our time was up. I don’t remember everything he told us but one impression stands out to this day.

This, I thought, was a man totally at ease with himself and his life. Paul Newman was probably the most contented man I have ever met, without a trace of self-congratulation or importance about him.

After he had gone, Richard turned to me. “How do you feel?” he asked. I thought for a moment.

“Privileged.”


User Image

BNAKERS HAVEN'T A CLUE.

16.10.08, 4:37am

When you blame American Bankers for the economic collapse just remember the capitalist system was subverted. US Banks were forced to give mortgages to people who didn't qualify. Not only were the two largest forced to give mortgages to unqualified buyers, the executives of the companies were given bonuses for each unqualified loan given.
There are cases in California where people making about 16,000 pounds a year were given mortgages for properties worth 400,000 pounds. This was done in the name of diversity. Does this term sound familiar to all of you?

• Posted by: r35Report Comment

User Image

BANKERS HAVEN'T GOT A CLUE..I HAVE A BETTER IDEA!

14.10.08, 9:21pm

Dear Richard and Judy,

The banking crisis has exposed the fiction that is capitalism for what it really is - namely the winners using the system at the expense of the losers (namely - all of us). The unfairness of the bailout is secondary only to the realization that the boom and bust scenario will continue indefinitely due to the greedy and exploitative nature of capitalism. Haven't we all had enough ? Isn't it now time to finally see the system for what it is - can we not all move forward in an evolutionary way and end this system once and for all?

How?

By the end of the use of money (and I don't mean to replace it with any form of bartering or anything like that) we would operate the system in exactly the same way as now - people would continue to work (except if they were employed directly or indirectly in the use of money - so no more bankers, tax collectors, accountants checkout operators etc) but the motivation for working would not be for financial remuneration as now but would be for the benefit of humanity as a whole.

It would entail only a small but important mental shift to enable it to happen - and instantly much of the crime in the world would end - no more mugging , burglary, fraud shoplifting etc - people would just take what they needed from shops - in return they would work in whatever sphere they do now .Stress would also be vastly diminished - no worrying about paying bills or the value of pension pots etc It is a 'grown up' system - and when you 'get' the idea it becomes self explanatory in so many ways. Fundamental to the idea would be recycling and minimising of waste - everyone would take just what they needed for that day/ week for themselves and their family. In the manufacturing process the emphasis would be on the production of only the best - so no more 'value' baked beans - quality would be the aim - no more throwaway society.

In time the need for private ownership would diminish and people would use things in the same way as they use libraries or cycles in Holland etc. The need for 'keeping up with the Joneses' would end etc and people who now are very well off wouldn't stop having their stuff - but the realisation that they have a holiday home that they use for only a few weeks a year would mean that they let it out to others for the rest of the year for others to benefit from would be commonplace.

It is an idea that is gathering pace - and not just amongst the 'loony lefties' it needs mass awareness - and that could be where you come in.
If you read these comments please think about it and email me to answer your questions - the chance to change the world in such a substantial way should not be overlooked as being 'naive utopian fantasy' just think about how the world would change and improve for the better - co-operating instead of fighting against each other - say in the development of new drugs - no profit / shareholders - just the drive to cure disease with no financial hindrance . WOW just think about it...

• Posted by: maryhelsby2008Report Comment

User Image

BANKERS NO FOOLS

10.10.08, 8:11pm

Dear Richard and Judy,

Maybe the low level Bankers were just playing the game and acting on greed. But those who control the game are no fools. Fools may have been led into this. Maybe we are fools when we let house prices rise due to the availability of mortgagues but I feel we are just playing the game we have been presented with.

There are some people at the top, Gordon Brown maybe a fool but that means that someone who is no fool is getting the PM to play the game.

All this de-leveraging is allowing someone to buy all these stocks at lower prices. Having been handed 500 Billion to buy stuff with, imagine how much more they can buy in a firesale. So who's lighting the fire?

I actually thought the whole thing was going to crash back in 2000 when Bush took over. I remember the news in 1999 said that Bill Clinton had navigated the USA to prosperity. Then in 2000 the news said that the USA was in financial trouble. It looked like the bubble would burst. But not much happened. Then 9/11 happened and we were all supposed to be scared of terrorists.

This crunch is engineered by powerful people just as 9/11 was engineered. You must have wondered if they allowed 9/11 to happen. You must be wondering if they are allowing the Credit Crunch to happen.

It's not down to fools, it engineered by very smart people who are playing people for fools to carry it out.

• Posted by: WaylandReport Comment

User Image

AND BROWN IS THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND

08.10.08, 6:29pm

Well said, R&J !!!
Ten years as chancellor and look at what Gordon Brown did: sold more than half our gold reserves at the very bottom of the market, destoyed pensions, taxed all but the top-earners beyond their capabilities, borrowed billions of pounds while talking about prudence.

What Brown did NOT do: prudently and wisely maintain a reserve of funds to provide protection against down times (the rainy day).
While we can thank Blair for destroying the UK's social makeup, we can thank Brown for destroying our finances.
All this is the legacy of New Labour !!!

• Posted by: NHSReport Comment

User Image

GOOD NEWS!

05.10.08, 8:55pm

Dear Richard and Judy, here is some really good news that seems to have escaped the media radar (I can't think why), and surely will give us hope for the future of society in these turbulent times:
In 2003 two countries decided to pool their expertise and provide free operations for people who were either blind or severely visually challenged. Not only was the surgery free but also the cost of transporting the patients to the hospitals and stays in local hotels. As a result, hundreds of thousands of people have had their sight restored. That's right, hundreds of thousands!
Worth a sizeable article in the good old Express I would think yes? For more info just Google "operation miracle" or "operacion milagro".
Best regards,
Charlie

• Posted by: CharlieintheCastelnauReport Comment

View All Comments

To view all 'Have Your Say' comments, click this button...

Share...

Got A Story? Get in touch online
Email the news desk directly here!


Blog Author

Richard and Judy

To see all of the stories by this author, click the button below for a complete list.

Todays best TV right here for you at the Express. • See Guide

The Political Cartoonist of the Year